Repeating a successful trick

Part of all the thinking your personality does, usually aims at repeating what he believes to be a success through splitting it into small and seemingly controllable pieces. For example, when a servant is nice to you in a shop. Your personality sees this as nice, and 'so' something which should be repeated. So he immediately starts the search for his own part in this success: that you smiled nicely, did say that it was a nice day, or whatever causes and reasons he can come up with. Also, he may imagine what it is he has to do in order to ensure that a next meeting is at least as successful as this one, or even better (or the impossibility of that). So that the next time, armed with these success factors, you should almost guaranteed be able to repeat this experience, which also is a huge limitation of yourself and the other person involved. (By the way, your personality applies the same mechanism for unpleasant situations as well).

In everyday life, this does not work like this, however, your personality does not really want to know that. Think of all those times where the situation did not develop the way he had designed: when you came with a present and the other person did not forgive you anyway, when you told the joke and nobody laughed, when you did what you believed the other person expected you to do and yet the other was not pleased by that, when you did enter the store and the servant was grumpy anyway. Etc. And in all those situations you are likely to have started your evaluation, like a good personality ;-), with looking for the cause of this failure with the óther person, without considering your own part in it.

Your inner Self does not need success in any situation, for him each situation is neutral in itself, and so he can 'permit' himself to freely enter into it and inspire you in a way which is best for everybody involved at that moment in time and for each and everybody's Awareness. So when you find yourself once more caught in the above vicious circle, then consciously become aware of what it is that your personality is doing, let go of your believe that you value the outcome in any way, and actively invite your inner Self to inspire you in this and future situations.