Safety (2)

Your personality looks for safety in people and things: your surroundings, the people, their reactions, the way your body feels, habits and rituals, the presence or absence of something, etc. Thus safety to him has become something like: what it is that you experience within yourself or see reflected back at you, conveniently matches with the way your personality would like this to be. There are enough familiar, known and for your personality 'good working' ingredients to make this work. It also seems controllable.

Safety is a feeling, and just like every other feeling, the result of an interpretation of a situation by your personality. You will attempt to get rid of un-safety as quick as possible, safety you are likely to want to hold on to, just like you do with all other feelings.

With your personality you look for safety on places which can never provide this to you. Your body was not 'designed' to be a safe place. Relationships are not 'designed' to be a safe place. Etc. There may be the occasional safe moment to be created through it, but it is neither their goal nor their essence. Both are suitable to experience separation, and in separation you are vulnerable by definition. It will save you a tremendous lot of effort when you truly realize this, then you no longer have to keep on trying to realize this. It simply cannot be done, and that is no personal mistake from you.

When you find yourself facing a safety issue, remind yourself of the following: this is not designed to be a safe place. Through this you free yourself from the goal of attempting to try to make that happen somehow. This you can apply to literally everything: from traffic to dark alleys, from your work to your vacation, from the building activities next door to buying a new pc. Do realize that the feeling you are really looking for, the quiet inner Knowing and Security, can be found through your inner Self, so actively invite this into the situation.

Safety simply is not the goal to strive for, although it will not work to deny your personality his need for safety, since that would only lead to counter reactions. The alternative to safety is not un-safety or risky situations, the alternative is your inner Self and its inspiration and experiences and which is not completely separated from others. Becoming aware that this is what safety issues are about, is enough, and then learn to trust that things can be at least as 'good' when focussing on your inner Self in your next logical growing step. You may help yourself by asking: what is it that my personality believes he needs in order to feel safe in this situation? The answers your personality will give you, are the issues you can immediately start do deal with to let go ;-).